How is a military man
5 things you should know BEFORE dating someone in the Military
hey everybody so this is my military wife account I'm kind of just gonna
share with you all about how I met Connor here's a picture of him.
and how we started dating.
Tips on dating a military man. Tips on being married to one.
um almost everything you can think of about living or not living with a
military man or woman.
First episode that I'm kind of going to do is five things.
Five things you should know before dating a military man.
Now I kind of want to say
something I don't want it to be mean but I think I should just say it.
um if you are dating a military man just date that military man don't marry him after two
months, don't marry him after five months, or even six months. Date him like he's
not in the military. Take military out and just date him. To often I've seen
women, who I know, date military men and it just not be something they want or
even mostly men dating women and it not being what they want them getting
divorced and the divorce rates are high in the military. Sometimes it works out
if you've known each other before the military but a lot of the times if you
know them in the military and you marry them in the military it doesn't work out.
Just because how can you know someone whenever you don't know someone for that
long. You date them for two months and then they're about to go on deployment
and so you say oh no I need to marry them now you're doing it for selfish
reasons you're marrying them because they're
leaving maybe you want the money maybe you want health insurance maybe you want
I mean I don't know who knows but you're doing it for selfish reasons
anytime you marry someone it should be purely on the fact that you love them
and that you're going to wait for them because he can be gone in two months get
deployed and you should still love him whether or not you're married to him if
you loved him you would wait till you got back and
then you would marry him. I know it's hard
it's so hard to be a military person but you you chose this life so now you have
to do it you can't just say I want to marry you now because you're going to
leave that's not that's not right
Number one the first thing which I've kind of touched on is it's gonna be hard
it's going to be really really really really really really a million times
hard. You can't be with them all the time like a regular husband and wife you just
you can't or even girlfriend and boyfriend because there are times here
in college where I see someone holding hands and I'm like wow sucks to be me
because I have no one's hand to hold but I remember that I'm so in love with
Connor that a hand hold doesn't matter because one day I'm gonna see him and
it's gonna be amazing and we'll get to hold hands
you know we're gonna kiss or whatever um so you have to be ready for that life
you have to be okay with long-distance and I was never that kind of person but
the love that you have for someone kind of overwhelms that and I'm now okay with
it just because I love him so much
Number two you can't always text or talk
to them that's kind of like a obvious kind of thing but you should know that
before you're going into it because as a girlfriend you want to text your BAE all
the time like I love you good morning blah blah you know but there are times
when I don't get anything all day I get a good morning I text him good morning
and then that's it until six o'clock at night when he's like hey heading home
like okay cool guess we're not talking right now cuz you're driving which is
kind of like selfish but like I want to talk to you now cuz I've been waiting
all day um but there's some people who you know like in the army where you
can't talk to them ever because they're fighting for our country literally so
that part is one of the hardest things to grasp because you expect when you
meet them you know you either meet them in person you chat it up or you meet
them online when they are not doing you know their duties or
whatever and you cha-cha-cha-cha chat until they have to go back to work back
to reality and it's this whole shift of I can't talk to you anymore
so that's one of the hardest things about being in the military for them and
us it's not we don't get to have that constant connection or it's a one day
Skype and that's it and so that's that's one of the hardest things number three
this is kind of like the previous one and it's you feel lonely all the time
that's very hard for people who live alone or you know their their wife and
they live alone or the generation that we're living in. Because the generation
that we're living in we are all very lonely we all say that we have tons of
friends and we connected so many people and we have like 500 people on Facebook
and Twitter and even snapchat you know you have a picture of yourself you show
people you know you think you have this a great community and what do you think
about who should I call to hang out it's like no one unless you have like a group
of friends obviously um but they're not going to be there for you all the time
either and so in this generation we've become lonely we've become people who
just lay down and watch Netflix and that's okay with us because we're
feeling lonely or we just you know whatever and so the fact that we have a
person who is supposed to be with us who's supposed to cuddle with us who's
supposed to love us and not be there that's like extreme loneliness right
there but we have to work through it and as a Christian I don't feel lonely
because I have the Lord and so I've had to work through that constantly because
I'm like the Lord is with me he is who I can turn to so I don't have to be lonely
um but I also you know still watch Netflix and all the other stuff so it
helps that helps but having security and who you are is one of the biggest things
you will need if you ever date marry a military man.
Number four they
are dedicated men this is kind of a good thing because you want a man who's
dedicated especially to you he is going to be dedicated to you no matter what
sure he there have been times where you know there aren't such good situations
going on in the home because they are gone and people are gone everything but
for the most part they are dedicated and even if they do say mess up they are
dedicated to fighting back what they lost as whether it's a husband or a wife
because I am from broken home and so I believe in the fight of getting back
together because anybody can be redeemed anybody can be forgiven and so I think
that the fight is the best part about it about a military man the fight and the
dedication that they have and so if you're in a hard relationship with a
military guy or woman and there's you know stuff going on and you don't know
how to handle it I encourage you to get support from people and I encourage you
to find help because if you're just as dedicated as he could be there's going
to be you're going to live in a group like a fantastic marriage that's
relationship if you both just fight which I know for sure that he will if
you give him the opportunity.
Number five I almost of ten five they get really
stressed out really really stressed out and I know a lot of people get stressed
out we all get stressed out I get stressed out to the max but Connor gets
stressed out and it's because the military puts a lot of pressure on that
pressure like doing things right getting stuff done having our whole country on
their shoulders to fight for. If one thing goes wrong that could be America
at risk basically. It depends on what kind of job they have that measures
their stress levels but I know all of them get stressed to a certain point and
so I just encourage all the women to be encouragers of their men because
that's what they need they need encouragers to just say it's okay to be
there to listen to them women have to be listeners we can't just be talkers um to
you know do anything to help them with their stress give them a foot massage if
you live with them give them a back massage give them anything they need to
not be stressed anymore but don't let it be unhealthy don't let it be like I need
to drink to get my stress out I need to get away from my wife to not be stressed
you as a as a woman as a wife is to encourage your husband daily or your
boyfriend daily um and so they're going to be very stressed out all the time and
it's your job to not eliminate the stress, but at least kind of soothe it to
make it a little bit better and trust me that will work in your favor for the
rest of your life if you encourage them so that's basically it for this video
and if you have any questions leave me a comment if you want me to do a video a
type of video leave a comment if you like this video give it a thumbs up if
you didn't like it give it a thumbs up um but other than that
thanks for listening and love yall!
